If We Dare to Dream Read online

  She just needed to figure out which was right.

  “Grady and Torie just left with their boys, Ian took off to meet Kat, and Ford and Isabel are watching a movie with Ana and David. That leaves just us. So start from the beginning.”

  “First promise me you’re not going to run and tell the others about what I tell you tonight… at least not until I have time to think about all this.”

  Hayden did not look very pleased but nodded his assent reluctantly. In fact, he looked very worried and seemed as tormented as she felt, which explained his hesitation to not involve the others. Whenever the family had run into problems, they always worked together to find a solution. With the balance of differing personalities and points of view, they always managed to come up with reasonable and effective ideas. That was, when they worked together. But Jamie was not ready for that yet. She needed to sort things out on her own before unnecessarily drawing everyone else into her current problem.

  She wiggled her toes where they were growing warm from the heat of the fireplace and silently pondered for a bit longer while Hayden patiently waited for her to speak. Taking a deep breath, she decided that she needed to just start from the beginning and tell everything, giving Hayden the opportunity to decide if she was right or not.

  “The night before Clay and I left for Vegas, Marissa and Rae took me out. We had dinner and then went dancing. We ended up at the bar because it was across the street from their condo. Do you remember where I lived before I moved in with Clay?”

  “Of course,” Hayden said.

  “We had a couple of drinks. I didn’t even finish one beer because I was driving home to Clay’s that night instead of staying with them. I was just getting ready to leave when I noticed the girl, Kit. She was pretty drunk and getting loud, so I told Marissa I was going.”

  Hayden nodded encouragingly.

  “Our waiter had pretty much disappeared, so I went up to the bar. Kit bumped into me then. She was so drunk that she took a spill at my feet.”

  Hayden’s brows rose in surprise. “They didn’t kick her out?”

  Jamie shook her head. “Not then… the bartender kid did shut her off, though. He knew her name, so I assumed she was a regular there. That’s pretty weird since she lived all the way in Gilbert. It’s a long drive for a heavy drinker.”

  “Her Gilbert address was actually just down the road. She was on the Mesa line in some complex off Val Vista Road.”

  “How do you know that?”

  He waved a hand in dismissal. “I remembered the case.”

  “Well, it still would have been a twenty-five minute or so ride from Clay’s.”

  “And that matters?”

  “It could, yes.”

  Her cryptic answer seemed to catch Hayden off guard again. She continued her story before he interrupted. “While I was waiting to pay my bill, a man came up and we began to talk. I’m pretty sure it was the same Andrew that’s now in jail.”

  “Scary.”

  “It gets creepier, trust me.”

  She took another sip of wine and laid her head back against the soft cushion of the rocker. “He was nice. Polite. He tried to hit on me, but I told him about Clay. He was okay with it. While we were talking, Kit was arguing with the waiter about another round. That’s when she puked.”

  “Gross.”

  Jamie smiled thinly. “It was. The guy, Andrew, grabbed me and pulled me out of the way. I thanked him, and Kit was escorted out. That’s the last time I saw her.”

  “Wow. That’s just crazy.”

  The patio fell silent as Jamie paused. All she could hear was the sound of the pool equipment making its cycle. Over and over again she replayed the events of the night in her head. While these thoughts had come upon her many times in the past, fear had always forced her to deny them. Tonight, she struggled with the idea that he had not committed the crime. How could he have?

  After another minute, Hayden spoke. “So how are you involved in all this?”

  Shaking her head, Jamie glanced at her brother. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s nothing. It was a long time ago.”

  “Tell me the rest.”

  “Rae and Marissa had found our waiter, so he and I went back to the table and paid there. The girls left since they were just walking across the street. The guy walked me out. Hayden, it was me in the black jacket. I still have it - it’s hanging in the closet in my room.”

  “Wait. You said he walked you out?”

  “Yes. He walked me to my car.” She bit her lip. “And he followed me almost all the way to Clay’s.”

  “You let him follow you home?”

  The disbelief in his voice was enough to cause Jamie’s cheeks to flush with color. “He wanted to make sure I made it safely.”

  “You allowed a murderer to follow you home?”

  The question was spoken with so much disbelief and anger that Jamie fell silent as she considered her answer. Hayden was staring at her, his eyes round with shock.

  “He didn’t follow me all the way home. He turned off before Clay’s development. Besides, Clay was there if I ran into trouble.”

  “Oh… your ex-husband would’ve been so helpful.”

  “Perhaps he would’ve at that point in our relationship,” she snapped. Hayden snorted in disgust, so Jamie sent him a fierce frown. “This has nothing to do with Clay, so don’t change the subject.”

  “But you could’ve been hurt by a man that’s really sick in the head.”

  “That’s just it,” she protested. “If he was with me, how did he kill that woman?”

  Silence fell as Hayden realized the extent of her words. His voice was low when he responded. “I can’t believe this.”

  Hayden placed his hands over his face and sat forward in his chair. The firelight danced in his hair, making some strands appear red. It almost matched the angry color that suffused his face. “This is bad, Jamie. This is just unbelievable.”

  Jamie nodded. “I don’t know what to do. I’ve thought about it all evening, and I can’t believe this guy did it. He never could have followed me and gotten back to kill her in the timeframe they have.”

  “He had a receipt, right?”

  “Which makes perfect sense. I got home at two. He could’ve turned off and gone east to that Denny’s. That would’ve fit the timeframe.”

  “How do you know what time you got home?”

  She remembered. That was one thing she was absolutely certain about. When she had pulled in, her car read two in the morning, and when she had climbed into bed with Clay, he had rolled over and made a comment about how tired she would be when they left. “Clay woke up when I got home. He laughed at me for getting home so late.”

  “Ok, so let me get this straight.” He paused for a moment to think. Frown lines appeared on his forehead, making him appear every bit of his 31 years. Gone was his normal nonchalant expression; in its place was a man feeling weighed down by the pressure of a momentous decision. “You say that you’re the missing alibi, the one that walked out the door with that guy?”

  She nodded.

  “And you were wearing a black jacket? Both of you had dark hair, almost the same length at the time?”

  “Yes, I suppose.”

  “Are you sure that it’s the same man, Jamie? Can you say that honestly, even after all this time?”

  She thought for a moment. After all, this was the very same conflict she had felt. But that scar and those unique, pale eyes. She remembered the scar when he smiled. It had to be the same man. “Unless he has a twin brother with matching eyes and a scar that reaches his temple, yes.”

  “Shit, Jamie, what have you gotten yourself into now?” Hayden asked sourly.

  Jamie sent him an exasperated look. “I didn’t ask for this.”

  “What do we do?” Hayden shook his head. “What do we do now?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Well, that’s what we need to decide and soon. If you keep your mouth shut about this, some innocent gu
y’s rotting away in prison and the real murderer is free somewhere... You need to tell.”

  “But what if I’m wrong?”

  “If you’re wrong, then at least you came forward and let them check out your story. I think you need to say something.”

  Jamie grimaced. “I’m not sure I want to get involved.”

  “Well, you never should’ve let some strange guy follow you home. Since when do you pick up random strangers?”

  Jamie glared at her brother. “How many times have you hooked up after a night out, Mr. Commitment-phobe?” Hayden had the grace to look a little embarrassed, so Jamie softened. “It’s a serious thing. What if he did do it? What if he turned off and hurried back to Gilbert? If I come forward and give him an alibi, I could be letting a murderer out of prison.”

  “All right. We should run this by Ian and Grady first. See what they think.”

  “Grady’s a malpractice lawyer, not a defense attorney.”

  “He still may know someone. Ian has to know about this.”

  Jamie shuddered. Ian would be even more upset with Jamie than Hayden appeared to be. His wrath could only be comparable to Ford’s.

  “I need to think about this. Just let me think about it for a day or two, okay?”

  Hayden grimaced. “Two days max, Jame, and I’m calling a family meeting.”

  She nodded. “Fine.”

  Chapter 3

  Winter 2009

  For two days she pondered, ignoring all of Hayden’s calls and shutting off her mobile phone as soon as she got home from work in case one of her brothers called her while she was thinking. She considered keeping her mouth shut and letting Andrew Sheehan work his own defense, but then she thought about the evils of the world and how humanity tended to turn a blind eye on injustice to better serve their own interests. Those ideas made her feel ill, sending her to start her pondering over again.

  By the afternoon of her second day, she pushed aside her stubborn streak and finally conceded that she did need the input of her brothers and that she could not figure everything out on her own. She was too frightened of making the wrong decision. To do so could ruin lives. With that thought in mind, she sent Hayden a text message during her lunch at the office and asked him to set up his family meeting.

  Twenty minutes later, she received the response: “After dinner. Ford’s office.”

  She shivered with dread.

  The rest of the afternoon was spent in a haze of worry. Her receptionist, Melissa, noticed her distraction and offered to reschedule her remaining appointments, but Jamie managed to slog through with only a minimum of stumbling. She even managed to set up three accounts that afternoon – a good thing for all of them. Still, she felt no triumph in her productive day. Instead she continued to worry. She was fifteen minutes early to the family meeting, sneaking inside Ford’s office so she could compose herself alone.

  The silence did not last long. One by one her brothers filed into the room, taking up various positions in the small room with the large mahogany desk that suddenly reminded Jamie of a judge’s bench. Ian arrived last in his uniform, having made the drive over to Ford’s straight after work. Though she was never afraid of her closest sibling, this evening he looked every inch the intimidating cop. The way he leaned over her with an angry scowl, gripping the arms of the chair she sat in with white knuckles once she had completed her story only confirmed her thoughts.

  “You did what?”

  Though he was not shouting, Ian’s tightly controlled anger was as disheartening as Ford’s. A quick glance at her eldest brother told her that he was just waiting for his turn.

  “I can’t believe you were so careless,” Ford said firmly.

  “You should’ve known better,” Ian snapped.

  Hayden pushed away from the wall he was leaning against and came to stand beside Ford. Jamie was gripped with the same fear Clay must have felt when all four tall, intimidating brothers hovered with scowls on their faces. Though she knew Hayden was on her side, he remained obstinately silent. That defection stirred her stubborn streak again.

  She met their glares with her chin held high. “Technically, this is my problem to solve, not yours, and if none of you can see beyond the reality that I once allowed a stranger to follow me partway home then I’ll just leave and figure it out on my own.”

  “She’s got a point.” Luckily, Grady jumped in to save her. “What happened isn’t the issue. What matters now is what we do with the information she’s giving us.”

  “That’s obvious. We do nothing,” Ford said abruptly.

  “What do you mean - nothing? We can’t keep quiet about this. This is serious,” Hayden protested.

  “She could be wrong,” he replied.

  Ian nodded in agreement. “It could be a different guy altogether. Look, it was what… almost four years ago? She’s talking about a guy she met once, in the dark.”

  “You make me sound like an idiot,” she growled.

  “That night you were,” Ian shot back.

  “Give me a break.”

  Hayden spoke up this time, his voice calm. “Jamie remembered his name even before the program announced it. That has to count for something.”

  Ian threw himself into the worn leather chair across from Ford’s desk. “I want the whole story, beginning to end again,” he said.

  All brothers nodded in agreement. Feeling as though their initial disappointment with her had passed slightly, she sighed and recounted the events of the night a second time. Hayden nodded occasionally as if to confirm what she had previously told him, and Grady’s brows drew together in deep thought.

  Ford and Ian just stared at her intently. But at least they were quiet.

  The room was silent when she finished. All four seemed lost in thought. Finally Ian laid his head back against the cushion of his chair. He spoke into the ceiling. “Do you know how hard it is to reopen a closed case? I’m not a detective, but I can tell you that it’s not pleasant. Just ask Chuck.”

  “All the more reason for her to put this all behind her,” Ford snapped.

  “I disagree,” Hayden said.

  “Her life’s a mess already. After Mom and Dad died, she decided that she’s going to mother every creep she can find. She’s already got a drug addicted ex-husband. Don’t add getting involved with a murderer to her list,” Ford insisted.

  Feeling as though she had been struck, Jamie shot from her seat and leaned over the desk to glare at Ford. “I may not have been as great a success as you, Ford, but I have made a pretty decent life for myself. I have a career and until this moment thought I had a supportive family that was helping me recover from a terrible divorce.”

  The room fell silent as Ford and Jamie stared angrily at one another. Neither willing to back down, the two stubbornly held their tongues. Finally, Ford shook his head. “I was in the right place at the right time, Jamie. I made money due to a housing boom. You, on the other hand, were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Now it could potentially expose you to questionable situations and questionable people. I’m sorry, but I have your best interests at heart.”

  She blinked in disbelief. “Best interests?”

  “Her best interests would be to report what she saw and what happened to the proper authorities and let them decide what to do with the information,” Grady said firmly.

  “And who would that be? Should she walk into the police station and find the detective that picked this guy up?” Ian asked.

  “Or the prosecutor? That would be rich,” Ford said.

  “How about the lawyer? I’ll take her to see him,” Hayden suggested. “Or how about Chuck? He’s a detective now.”

  “I thought he was still healing?” Grady said. Their cousin had been in a motorcycle accident while on duty and had been confined to a wheelchair while his injuries healed.

  “He’s back to work,” Ian said offhandedly. “He’s taken that detective position he wanted before, so he’s one we should consider talking to.”
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  Jamie sat back down in her seat and closed her eyes. As her brothers argued over what her next step was, she tried very hard to put Ford’s careless insult behind her. Though she knew that she was being overly sensitive, his words had cut her mostly because she knew deep down that he did have a very good point. She was a nurturer at heart, and she had tried to take care of Clay in the same manner she had cared for her ill parents before they died. That did not make her feel very good about herself and her life choices.

  “Ford’s right,” she announced. Four dark heads turned back to her, and all four pairs of eyes shone curiously. “I’ve made a mess of everything. If I report this now, something terrible will probably happen. I should just keep my mouth shut and let the authorities come find me if they can.”

  Before any of her brothers could respond, she pushed herself out of the chair and brushed between Hayden and Grady. She hurried from the room as fast as she could and closed the door behind her, biting back tears. It was a short walk to the front door, and she headed that way blindly. As much as she loved her brothers, this was not their concern and she should not have considered involving them.

  But what was done was done, and now the problem would be convincing them of that.

  ***

  Ford was at a site when he called her the next morning. It was almost as though he knew the exact moment she entered the office, for she had just set her purse in her lower desk drawer and closed it when the phone rang. Jamie could hear the sounds of a nail gun blasting like a gunshot in the background and felt a twinge of pity for her brother. Just a few short years ago he was busy with large jobs and so much work that he was constantly looking for new hires to help him. That busy time also found him confined pretty much to his office, where he was scheduling and arranging crews. The large builders in the valley had slowed tremendously when the housing market crashed in the area, and Ford had to let several crews go. Now he had so much extra time that he could personally visit his work sites, which were down to home remodels and foreclosure clean-ups.